Stress

Stress creeps in and steals away the joys that were possible.

Lord, please fill me in this place so that the stress will be lessened. Let me look to You in these moments, help me to remember Your promises. I long for You in this place and know that only You can fulfill me truest desires.

The emptiness we feel is real. Our hearts are calling out for what is missing, a true relationship with the Living God.

I need to refocus. How easily my point of view turns back to self. When I look to me, all falls apart. When I try to control, I lose all control and I begin to spiral. You are my rock, my shield, my salvation and my Lord.

I bow before You. I know that You are most wise and I trust You in all things.

Remind me of the cross and all that You have done for each of us. Your ungrateful children. When will we learn?

You are so patient and so kind. I long to have just a fraction of Your grace and mercy.

My emotions can be useful but they can also blind me. I give them to You. I choose to no longer fight them but to feel them, acknowledge them and give them over to You.

Shine Your mighty light into this weary soul and help me see the truth in all things. Let my perspective be from Your eyes and Your heart. The struggles of this world mean nothing next to You. The stressors fade when You are with me. My focus determines my response and my focus needs to be on You.

Show me Your plan, show me my purpose and let me see me the way You do.

I pray these things in the precious name of Jesus. Amen and Amen.

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My prayer for today

Lord, I want to see You, feel You and hear You in my heart. Each day I long to know You more. No one truly knows me like You do and yet You seem to be the one I try to hide from at my lowest times. It’s as if I am ashamed of my lowest moments and yet you are right there with me. You not only hear me, You know the word of my heart long before they are known to me. This I can rest in.

You are almighty, You are our Creator, You are all together good, You are full of love, grace and mercy.

I am Yours. You created me. You knew me before I took my first breath in this world. You lay my path before me and I struggle to see it so many times. You know that too.

You have held me close in my darkest moments, even when I thought myself a full blown enemy of Yours.

Why?

Why do You love me so much when I often think myself unlovable? Why do You bring such beauty and such blessings to me when I know I don’t deserve them? How can You look upon this soul with loving kindness? How can You forget all that I have done?

I am Yours. I am a child of the Almighty God and I can find my strength in that. I pray that I can see myself the way that You see me. I want to forgive myself as You have forgiven me. I want to see the beauty that is possible as You do. I want to walk in Your footsteps in all things. I want to be content with where I am, knowing that You have a much bigger plan than I can even begin to imagine.

I rest in You Lord. I love in You. You are all that matters. You are my peace and that is all that matters. Let the world melt away, let my uncertainties melt away. Let the stress fade away into the background as I gaze upon Your beauty. Fill me with Your mighty Spirit, guard me against the attacks on my enemy and build me up as I stumble.

My words fall short of the craving in my soul, but I know that You know my desires better than I. Mt heart cries out to You and I pray that You hear me as I lay it all down before Your throne.

Thank You for being the merciful God that You are. Thank You for never leaving me. Thank You for all the beauty, blessings and family that You have so freely given me. Thank You for saving me, thank You for loving me and thank You for all the work You are continuing to do in this life. You are amazing and I would be lost without You.

I pray these things in the precious name of Jesus. Amen.

Why should I share?

These past few months have been flying by! Work, family, fun, lots of fun. Often I have found myself contemplating various ideas and thinking that I should come on here to share with all of you, and then I talk myself out of it. I begin to think that maybe it’s not important to share that particular idea.

Today I am on here to remind myself and all of you that we need to share. Sharing our struggles, triumphs and questions helps us all grow. I love to be reminded that I am not alone in my wanderings. To let all of you know that you are not alone has always been my wish.

To be open and honest with our imperfections. To allow ourselves to be vulnerable with each other. To accept and love each other in the midst of it all. These are my hopes for us.

I don’t want to get on here to vent and bash my life. I want to embrace this life, dig deep and grow. I want to share my wrongs and how God has healed this wounded soul. I want to take ownership and I want you all to be here with me in it. I want to hear from all of you and learn from your experiences. I want my perspective to continue to grow. I want us all to be open, honest and true in front of one another. How frightening and how liberating it can be.

This culture I live in tells me to be strong, put on a happy face, judge those that are different and cover the not so pretty parts of me. I don’t want to anymore.

Today I choose to be happy with who I am at this very moment. I choose to stop and just be comfortable in my own skin. Today I choose to love what God created in me. When I tell myself that I am not good enough, I am essentially telling God that He made a mistake. When I tear myself apart for not measuring up to some standard I have set, I am telling God that I am the one in control.

God gave me this life. Jesus died so that I can have a relationship with Him. Right now is when I am looking to God and telling Him that I give up. I give up the illusion of control that keeps me captive. Isn’t that the kicker? That when we get down to it, I am the only one allowing myself to be held captive. I am the one listening to the lies whispered in the background, I am the one not bringing these uncertainties before the Holy One that I know can deliver me. I keep myself tucked away in the dark, afraid to step out in the light.

Today I encourage you all to take that leap of faith. Step out into the Glorious Light that Jesus provides. Our Lord will never force anything on us, even if He knows just how beautiful that outcome will be. It is up to each of us to decide to let the garbage go and walk out of our self created cells. We are not imprisoned by some unseeing force that holds us captive. We allow it to happen when we live in the shame that has already been paid for by Jesus.

Have faith my friends. Don’t allow the shame to keep you from the freedom that is so much closer that you realize. Bring all your pain, sorrow, shame and guilt before the Great Healer and you will be blown away by the work He is aching to do in you.

Love you all and pray that we all give up the things that keep us back so that we would live fuller lives.

Ordinary Family

We are an ordinary family. We wake early each morning ready to take on the day that is ahead of us. We all head out to work, school and daycare with hugs, kisses and word of “I love you”, “have a great day” and “see you this afternoon”.

Our weeks are full of Sunday morning church, teaching Sunday school, working the sound boards, work, school, homework, fellowship, ministries, band practice and home cooked meals together. We try to balance work, play and responsibilities. We want to make an impact in this world, in our community, in each other.

We are an ordinary family.

We try to limit mindless self-indulgences but leave time to just be. We love to spend hours outside playing when it’s nice out and to have times of creating together. Our house is open to all, we love cooking for friends and sharing our space. Intimate moments shared and shoulders cried on while the children play innocently all around. We love sharing the space we have been blessed with.

We have our struggles and we have our moments of frustration and fleshing out. We are only human, but we forgive, repent and move onward and upward. We lift each other up.

We are not the extraordinary, we are ordinary and we strive to love others as we are loved by our Lord and Savior.

We allow ourselves to be interruptible. We look to pause and truly listen to those who come to us in confidence. We offer all we have and think of nothing as really ours. We are stewards and long to honor our King with all He has entrusted us with.

We are loved and we are blessed. We have so much more room for growth but acknowledge how far we have come. No guilt.

We are ordinary and look to not be ashamed of where we are or the struggles we experience. We share our lives with those around, we push through and try to remain transparent. We all have burdens to bear and should be able to share with each other and help each other carry these burdens. We are not meant to be bear them alone.

I hope that I am approachable and kind enough that all feel comfortable approaching me with their worries and their burdens. I hope that when others look in on our lives they see that we are far from perfect and do not pass judgment. We understand and want to stand by your side in all your happiest moments and to walk by your side in all your darkest moments too.

We are an ordinary family that expect extraordinary things from Jesus for He has done such amazing things within these lives. I know He can do amazing things in your life too, you just need to give Him the space to do them!

Jesus loves you and so do I.