Questioning

I question everything and am unsure about most things. Often people will tell me how sure I always seem to be, I do not feel that way and am surprised that I present that way. I do not look to deceive anyone and have put some thought into why I would seem so sure to those I come into contact with when I feel so uncertain inside.

The answer is Jesus, He is the only one I have ever been truly certain of. I know that He is by my side in all things, I know that He has me right where I need to be for His Glory and I know that He will never turn away from me. This is the only certainty I hold in this life.

I know that no matter how unsure I am, Jesus is sure and has given my The Holy Spirit to guide me through this life. I know that no matter how unqualified I may feel for a task at hand, Jesus shows me the way through it. My faith has grown and I have learned to trust in our Lord in all things. I don’t need to feel comfortable and I don’t need to understand in order to do the work He lays before me. I just need to pray and discern His will and His direction in all things and I know that it will all be ok. This brings me such peace and calm.

I still worry and battle anxiety often. This is something that I know The Spirit is working on in me and I know that it does not help me through any situations. I also accept that I am human and cannot deny my human nature. As my faith grows, so does my ability to remain calm and patient. I have a long way to go, but I can also look back and see that I have already come such a long way already.

Lord, I come before You today with my anxious heart and I ask that you remind me that You are in control of all things and I need not fear the unknown. I pray that my heart remembers all that You have delivered me from in the short time I have been walking with You. I pray that my patience and peace continue to grow and deepen as I learn to trust You, for I know that my worry and angst are clues that I am not trusting in You completely. You are true Love and true Hope. You walk with me always and are working in all things. I give my emotions over to You Lord and ask that You teach me to slow down, sit quietly and to bask in You presence.

I thank You for this life You have given to me. I thank You for Your kindness, Your Love, Your Light and Your patience. I thank You and praise You for Your goodness and pray that I learn to appreciate You more each day. You are good, You are kind and I hope to be more like You each day.

Today I challenge myself and I challenge all of you to stop and take inventory of the blessings in your life. Turn away from the things you do not have and choose to count all that you are fortunate to have. Praise Him for the roof over your head, the food in your home, the relationships, etc. These things have been given to you by our Mighty King and we are His stewards. Take care of even the smallest of things put in your care and tend to all you are given with tender love and kindness.

I am exactly where I am meant to be and need to keep the proper perspective. It is so easy to get wrapped up in the stress, the frustrations and the anxieties of this world, but I know there is a higher purpose and I choose to maintain that perspective. I also ask that each of you remind me of this should we cross paths and you see me struggling. I will do the same for you. We are in this together!

 

 

Advertisements

Beauty

image

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

All I want to say to you today is that God thinks you’re beautiful,  even if you don’t.

He knows EXACTLY where you’ve been, where you are  and where you are heading.

Trust in Him, allow Him to love you, and follow His will for your life.

In this you will find true happiness.

Endurance

7 But we have this treasure in jars of clay, to show that the surpassing power belongs to God and not to us. 8 We are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not driven to despair; 9 persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed; 10 always carrying in the body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be manifested in our bodies. 11 For we who live are always being given over to death for Jesus’ sake, so that the life of Jesus also may be manifested in our mortal flesh. 12 So death is at work in us, but life in you. – 2 Corinthians 4:7-12

Funny, I have just finished listening to an audio book and, subsequently, started a new one. The former ended in reminding us readers that we are to carry our cross DAILY and to endure the sufferings for they bring God glory if we allow it. The latter began on this same subject. Suffering, enduring and living in Christ’s name. Allowing all we go through to bring Him glory.

I found my thoughts drifting in two directions….first I was thinking, do I really suffer for Christ? I am a spoiled American girl. Sure, I have struggled in various ways, I have endured spiritual, physical and emotional pain. I have wondered how to make ends meet. Do these count? How am I bringing Him glory in these things?

My second train of thought was that no matter what country we live in, not matter how our culture is, Jesus tells us to live differently. That definitely applies to me. I often think how difficult it is for believers in other parts of this vast world. I can’t imagine what it would be like to have my tongue cut out of my mouth for speaking God’s truth. This is not something that should make me discount my life. I am called to live differently too. I am called to go against the grain and love, share and support when society tells me to hate, hoard and abandon. I am to make a difference in the place God has set me in.

Lastly, I endured a weekend that was quite difficult in both an emotional and a spiritual way. At the end of Sunday night I was asking Jesus to just take me away. I no longer wanted to endure the trial I was in. I wanted Him to take it away. Why? Why do I have to be in this? That was my question.

Today, a friend told me to read a section of a book she reads each morning and I realized that I am suffering for Christ. I am enduring difficult times and different attacks for His glory. I have seen how He has been working and will continue to do so if I can keep my side of the bargain, look to Him for peace and give Him the glory.

The section read:

BE PREPARED TO SUFFER FOR ME, in my Name. All suffering has meaning in MY kingdom. Pain and problems are opportunities to demonstrate your trust in Me. Bearing your circumstances bravely – even thanking Me for them- is one of the highest forms of praise. This sacrifice of thanksgiving rings golden-toned bells of Joy throughout heavenly realms. On earth also, your patient suffering sends out ripples of good tidings in ever-widening circles…

So today I see that this is what He means for me to endure and I am NOT to compare it to what others are enduring. I am important. I play a vital role in God’s kingdom and am making a difference in ways I am meant to. I am loved and happily endure the stressors of this life for my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. I will not be discouraged today. I will continue to live in His light and accept the peace only He can provide.

I choose to die to self and live for you Jesus.

In His grace and glory I wish these things for you as well.